crUsh
Yes, yes I know it's been a while since my last post, and my loyal readers (all 2 of them) are tired of having nothing new to read. It's odd, plenty was going on, but there was nothing worthwhile to write about. iTV is done, my thesis work seems to ebb and flow, the packing and moving process is picking up pace, I will be homeless in less than a week, and I am about to inflict a bunch of (hopefully pleasant) surprises on a number of my friends. All in all, a dull life.
But this post is about something else. I never thought I'd write about this, mostly because I never thought I'd think about it as much as I am. The last major crush I had in Denver ended disastrously, especially after what she did in India. So I am no longer in the mood to be "just friends" either. But that was before the move to Muncie, so it's HIGH time I moved on. Of course, there's also AB, but I don't care much to regurgitate any of those details. Joy and sorrow in the same minute, amazing how she could evoke such a reaction in me.
As I write this, I'm beginning to feel like I am in school again (not like that time of my life was the most fun, but let's back out of that dark alley.) But I have developed a crush on someone. And while I am not about to reveal her identity, she will affectionately be referred to as JM. Interestingly, we have never exchanged so much as two words to each other, nor are we a part of each other's circles. And it's highly doubtful that will ever change, mostly considering that I am about to leave Muncie in about a week (yay!), but also, she's WAY out of my league. But God, is she beautiful. The gorgeous round eyes, the killer smile, clear soft skin and the glasses to add just the right touch of sophistication. Yesterday, I saw her at the TCOM banquet in a beautiful green dress. Jeans do not do justice to those legs!
But I should stop. Else this should become a collection of tunes from Sting. I sing 'Every Breath You Take' and she sings 'Don't Stand So Close To Me'. Yeah, bad joke.
Anyway, May cometh (how will this b'day turn out?!) and my life is about to be blown in all directions at once. I look forward (fearfully) to take life one day at a time, without an anchor (place or person) to hang on to. Relationships will change, new bonds will be formed, older ones may grow stronger and some may break like branches from a tree. I hate the thought of it, but at least one won't hurt as much, because there is no room for trust in it. Yes, it all sounds very cryptic, but the wound is yet to heal.
But this post is about something else. I never thought I'd write about this, mostly because I never thought I'd think about it as much as I am. The last major crush I had in Denver ended disastrously, especially after what she did in India. So I am no longer in the mood to be "just friends" either. But that was before the move to Muncie, so it's HIGH time I moved on. Of course, there's also AB, but I don't care much to regurgitate any of those details. Joy and sorrow in the same minute, amazing how she could evoke such a reaction in me.
As I write this, I'm beginning to feel like I am in school again (not like that time of my life was the most fun, but let's back out of that dark alley.) But I have developed a crush on someone. And while I am not about to reveal her identity, she will affectionately be referred to as JM. Interestingly, we have never exchanged so much as two words to each other, nor are we a part of each other's circles. And it's highly doubtful that will ever change, mostly considering that I am about to leave Muncie in about a week (yay!), but also, she's WAY out of my league. But God, is she beautiful. The gorgeous round eyes, the killer smile, clear soft skin and the glasses to add just the right touch of sophistication. Yesterday, I saw her at the TCOM banquet in a beautiful green dress. Jeans do not do justice to those legs!
But I should stop. Else this should become a collection of tunes from Sting. I sing 'Every Breath You Take' and she sings 'Don't Stand So Close To Me'. Yeah, bad joke.
Anyway, May cometh (how will this b'day turn out?!) and my life is about to be blown in all directions at once. I look forward (fearfully) to take life one day at a time, without an anchor (place or person) to hang on to. Relationships will change, new bonds will be formed, older ones may grow stronger and some may break like branches from a tree. I hate the thought of it, but at least one won't hurt as much, because there is no room for trust in it. Yes, it all sounds very cryptic, but the wound is yet to heal.
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